-
12:24 p.m. - Thursday, Aug. 19, 2004

Good afternoon people!

Well let's see what has been going on with me lately. I am still holding some anger towards Mr. Man. It's not just going away like it usually does. I mean I am back to thinking is this going to work. It already seems like I am the only one that gives a damn. Then he says that he's not ready. I just don't know what to do. He keeps going back into this pattern of getting lazy and fucking up. He keeps telling me that he's going to change but he hasn't. Now I am not as dumb as you all think I am I know that I can not change a person but I do believe that a person can change themselves.

Cookie Cookie Cookie...... Why are you doing this to yourself?

I know I know it just that I love him more than I have ever loved anyone before. We have this whole life worked out. The things that we have all ready been through together. The biggest reason that I am haven't a hard time with this is because... I don't want to go through this again. The getting to know a person becoming friends, lovers, and then partners for life. That is a lot of work to be going through all over again. Not too mention that my son would have to meet someone new. this is just messed up in fact I don't even want to talk about it anymore.

Peace

Cookie

� | �