busy busy busy
1:30 p.m. - Wednesday, Aug. 18, 2004

I know you all think that I have fell off the face of the earth but I promise that is not the case. I have just been so super busy. Getting back used to this being a student, being a mother, and being a wife thing takes some getting used too. School has been going pretty good I have so far gotten A's on everything that I have done. Plus the work is really easy it just takes up time. The younger students have already gotten on my nerves and they continue to do so every minute that I am around them... Sorry got off topic... Anyway I will be done with this program within the next week. Then I start real school on September 27th. That is the part that I am worried about. This work is easy because most of the people here are going to be 1st year students me on the other hand will be coming in my 3rd year. I can just imagine how much harder that work will be. As far as my relationship... We went from being on the love ship to a shipwreck. We made love everyday for a whole week now it like I almost don't want him to touch me. It getting harder to take his words at face value. We enrolled in pre-marital class at the church. The classes started 3 weeks ago. They met every Saturday between 3 and 5 pm. Would you believe that he has not been to one class? So I sit there being the only person by herself in a couple�s session. He always finds an excuse for not coming. I usually take them and let it go but I just can't anymore. So needless to say I am pissed off about that. It's like he is going back into his old ways. When he came back from the trip he was so gun-ho about everything. He was on the move getting things done. Now I don't see him doing much of anything. He has been cleaning up the living room for two weeks and it is still dirty. It's like he's not really trying to pull his weight at all. I am also starting to see that I was the only one talking about getting marriage. I was the only one telling people and making plans. He was all like, "whatever." So I told him my thoughts and he told me that he wasn't really to take that step yet. (So why in the hell would you ask me to marry you!) So I asked him why did he ask me if he wasn't ready yet? He said something about he was going to be ready. (Well that's not going to fly with me) I told him that I thought that was unfair from him to be getting my hopes up if he's not ready. I told him that we need to call the engagement off because I don't want to be lead in a wrong direction. It's ruff but I have to go now you know busy.....busy......busy

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