I got accept to Columbia!
12:41 p.m. - Tuesday, Jun. 29, 2004

Ok I know you all have been Like what in the hell is her problem. I am sorry the I have been away for so long.

My bipolar is getting wrost and wrost. I mean it's really sad. It's like I can see what's going on but I can't do a damn thing about it. I will be sooooo down then in the next five minue I am all up and happy just to be back down again. It's pissing me off.

I got accepted into my Dream school. That's right I will be attending Columbia College this Fall. I am so happy even though if you were looking at me right now you wouldn't think so. Well I started out really happy but then you know He had to fuck that up. Yea we got into it again. And you know what I am getting tried of writing about that shit. Just like I am tried of dealing with it. I feel like I am being bended and twisted to fit whatever it is that he wants and I hate this feeling.

Here's a story for you. We got into a heated debate about having sex before marriage. Now I know that I do it but I also feel that it's wrong and I am trying to put a stop to it. It's apart of this spirtual cleansing that I have going on within myself. Well just like any man (and my male friends who feel that I am wrong for thinking this please hit my tag board) who feels that they are about to lose thier pussy he tried to find a way out. He said that he didn't belive in that part of the bible. Said that most of the bible is hearsay anyway. Started talking about how marrage now isn't like it was back then and everything esle. Then he went on to say that in his eyes we were already married. (Now to the brothers again is this or is this not another way to just prolong something?) I took his word and raised him two. I said ok if you feel that way lets get married tomorrow. You all know what he said right being the smooth person he is. He said "I wouldn't have a problem with that." The next day I raised him two again and called city hall and got all the information that we needed to get married. When I was done I gave it to him and then he says he thinks he needs a second opinion. Well isn't that something.

I am kinda pissed at my little brother right now and that is saying a lot because I am almost never upset with him. He has been spending some time at my house since he got out of school. Well yesterday he brought his girl over without asking, which was the frist no no. Then they were suppose to leave but didn't so they stayed up in my house while I was gone. I come back and they got hickeys all over the place and her hair is all messed up I mean what the hell! Last and least the girl spent the night up in my house. I kept asking when and how was she getting home but he was giving me the run around. I am so fucking tired of people just fucking me over you know it's like they say of Cookie don't care so lets use her.

I want to send out very special Thank You's to my very best friend Spicy and my big sister Meadow. You all are there when I need you the most and for that I say thank you.

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